Las Vegas

I risk dating myself here but I’ll say it anyway: the last time I visited Las Vegas before this trip was in the early 90s.   I didn’t like it then, but it provided a certain amount of fun and entertainment and it was cheap, which then , traveling on a tight student’s budget was worth something in and by itself.

This place ain’t for me. Pic: discoverthetrip.com

This time I absolutely hated the place and couldn’t wait to get out.  I know I am in the minority on this one, vastly outnumbered by people who love Vegas and everything about it.  But, seriously, what is there about it?

What bothered me most the first time around (just like in Disneyland, btw) is the fakeness of it all.  This is probably my German side – forever seeking for authenticity – that is so strongly reacting to fake Eiffel Towers, fake Venetian canals, fake Statues of Liberty, fake everything.  I remember about 10 years later – I was by then living in California – a colleague of mine taking a long weekend trip to Vegas where she staid at the Venetian coming back to work and marveling about Vegas in general and the hotel in particular “just like Venice, only cleaner” were her words.  The words of somebody, I might add, who had never set foot into Europe.  One thing is true, the streets in Venice are dirtier than the halls of the hotel, but they are streets, not hallways kept spotless by an army of underpaid mostly Mexican cleaners.  But anyway, that was then.

This time I was prepared for the fakeness and willing to try to just go with the flow and enjoy it.  But this time the problem was a different one, it was what Umberto Eco describes in his Travels through Hyperreality so very aptly with the words “behind the facades lurks a sales pitch”.  And that is exactly it, Vegas has become a expensive make-believe luxury destination for those who can’t afford the real thing and unlike before one pays dearly for that illusion.  With the exception of parking and the spectacles some casinos put up, e.g. a fake volcano eruption every half hour starting at 5 pm,  everything in Vegas is expensive and wherever you turn somebody wants to sell you something.  Now maybe there are still cheap lunch buffets in parts of town where one doesn’t want to be, serving food that one does not care to eat, but at our Hotel at the Strip we spent almost $70 for a three Pho soup lunch with tea and a soda – I can get this in Silicon Valley for $25.  The da Vinci exhibition at a hotel was $52 for the three of us – that was after we used a 40% off coupon – and it was okay, not great.  What irked me was that they were trying to upsell us on some cheesy picture of us taken in front of a green wall with brushes in our hand that came out looking like we were painting the Last Supper.   I mean, seriously …

The other thing that disturbed me was the vengeance with which the hordes of people embraced this whole spectacle of conspicuous over-consumption.  Huge alcoholic drinks in silly shaped plastic containers where hauled around on the street (and not just by 21 year olds – that I would understand but by people in their 40s and 50s), as well as  shopping bags (do other cities not have the usual array of clothing stores?), people dressed up (or tried to) walking around in the silliest combinations and I have seen more than a reasonable share of naked legs in sandals at around 0 to 5 degrees Celsius – with other words: freezing temperatures.  I think we were the only people on new Years Eve not wearing a 2013 tiara, other head gear, glasses, necklaces, whatever.  Everything is about consuming more and more, everything needs to be bigger, everybody seems to want to outclass the rest, live the high life, be fake-rich and show it off.

Okay, I am am done now.  I won’t go back if I can at all avoid it.  Maybe somebody who has been to Vegas and liked it can try and explain to me what you see in it.  I can’t wrap my mind around it.

Glass Half Empty

This very typically little story happened to me just the other day and I thought it was, well, very typical of the difference in culture between the US and Germany.  So here it goes.

General German sentiment: things will be worse tomorrow and even worse later.

I am on the LinkedIn Alumni list of my old/first university, the one in Germany.  As you might or might not know alumni relations is rather new to Germany, and in general people graduate and then pretty much forget about their universities.  So when they slowly started building closer relationship with their alumni I felt honor bound to at least sign up and participate.  The group is not very active but every once in a while an interesting post comes along which is worth reading and commenting on.

So the other day I saw that somebody had posted a ranking of “new” universities (those less than 50 years old) and my good old – or should I say new – university secured a spot among the top 15.  Pretty darn good, I thought for a small university in a provincial town in southern Germany.  I commented positively and tweeted the article.  Exactly the behavior that is expected from and commended in every good American.

The reaction I got should not have surprised me but still it did: the next person responding to my comment basically wrote: it ain’t all that great, in 5 years the university will not be “New” anymore and where will that leave us?  On the list of all universities this places is only “whatever not so stellar number) and the German universities in general aren’t doing so well, worse than the Dutch, blablabla, etc.

How very German!  Instead of focusing on the positive, the good ranking now and thinking that we have a few years to improve the overall ranking the focus is on the bad, the negative, the problem.  Maybe the typical American focus on the forever positive outlook, the incessant “everything will be alright” attitude is not realistic and at times outright annoying but the relentless focusing on the negative, the automatic assumption that whatever can go wrong will go wrong and that it is downhill from here is depressing. Why is that the automatic negative reaction, why forever focus on the bad?

I hate to say it, but it seems almost German nature.

Tragedy

Yesterday a seemingly healthy and – from what we read and hear in the news – exceptionally smart 20 year old grabbed three guns and shot 27 people – 20 elementary school kids among them – in a small, affluent little town in Upstate New York.

Some facts about guns, pic: http://www.thenation.com/article/169295/gun-control-dream#

This tragedy is incomprehensible and hits especially close to home for us as we have a kid in elementary school, too – albeit across the country.  But outside the shock and sadness I feel and the deep empathy for the family members whose lives are destroyed as mine would be if my son was murdered, I feel rage and despair and a deeper disconnect from this country as I have ever felt.

In the wake of this tragedy what we hear is the call to stand firm by the Second Amendment clause giving the people of this country to right to bear arms.  What we hear are the same old stupid lines repeated such as “guns don’t kill people, people kill people” and “we need to get the crazies off the street, then these things wouldn’t happen.”  This phrase were stupid and superficial and  deeply hurtful even in the instances of shootings where the gunman was somebody who struggled with mental health issues.  In all those recent cases of  “crazies” shooting up schools and movie theaters, apparently the system failed to keep people who – after the fact where called crazy or mentally ill – from buying guns.  In all cases the system failed to recognize the severity of the mental health issues in people and to get them off the street and to provide them with help.   Curiously enough, the same people who want no gun control also often hate the government and want to “starve the beast (of government)” thereby effectively doing away with organized mental health treatment options.

This case, though,  is different again.  The guy wasn’t crazy, or maybe he was but there were no signs unless you count being shy and very smart as crazy (in which case I know a lot of crazy people).  Even if we got every single person worrying about alien invasions, speaking incoherently to themselves or drawing pictures of bombs off the street this tragedy would have happened.  The only thing that could have prevented this is if the guy did not have access to a number of guns and ammunition.

He could have still killed, that is another lame argument by the gun lovers, with a knife, or an ax or a dagger.  True, he could have, maybe a few people before being overpowered or running out of steam.  I have no personal experience with this but it seems logical that killing with a distance weapon like a semi-automatic gun is entirely different from stabbing somebody to death or running after somebody with an ax.

The reactions across the political spectrum was interesting.  Most notable I found that the right wing press (which I sometimes read to try and understand how the other side is thinking ) has ignored the shooting to a large extent or argue that God let this happen because people weren’t pious enough.  Red State.com saw fit to bemoan the fact that as a nation we only come together during events like this shooting rather than for happy occasions like sporting events.  Seriously, is that all you have to say in a situation like this, “let’s applaud our Olympics gymnastics team more energetically”?  I won’t even comment on the highly offensive comments made but the ultra-right fringe, their God is way to hate- and revengeful to  pay any attention to.

Most shocking, though, I thought was some of the main stream reaction I saw on Facebook, etc.  “nothing will change”, “this is how it is”, “People will not give up their guns” etc.  20 kids and 7 adults are dead in an entirely preventable tragedy and the American people collective say a prayer for the families, hug their children and shrug their shoulders.  Where is the wide-spread outcry, where the demands to stop this madness?  Where is the horror over this and where the empathy for the victims and those who will inevitably follow behind?

I read an editorial in the New York Times, written by a father of a young man who was killed 20 years ago in a killing spree and who struggled and fought for gun control and eventually gave up realizing that Americans as a nation – not all individuals – seem to be willing to accept such tragedies as they price they have to pay to own and carry around their (concealed) guns.

What a terrible and disheartening testament.  What a cruel message to the families of the victims, these and the ones before and after, a message that says “what happened to you is bad and I sure wouldn’t want it to happen to me or the people I know but I accept that you pay the price so I can buy my 13 year old a semi-automatic weapon for his birthday.”

And this message, this fundamental disregard of life, this utter lack of empathy and sense for the greater good I struggle with more than with anything else in the country I have ever struggled with.

Destination Imagination – Or How to Stifle Creativity

I was wondering where to post this one, here or on my other blog called America explained (I admit, I am not lacking ambition), but decided to post it here.  Check out the other blog, though, if you are interested.

My son is a geek, he likes sciences and is good at math.  He is similar to his mom, who likes sciences – and isn’t all that great at math.  This year we signed him up for a program called Destination Imagination (in short DI) which is a nationwide contest in which teams complete a challenge – often engineering-related but for variety there are also plays and more social type challenges.

The not so creative creativity contest. pic: hongkiat.com

We liked the idea of elementary school kids using their imagination and creativity to solve problems.  That is the theory.  The practice is – the opposite.  The team of youngsters has to pick one of five challenges, if it was me the challenge would be something like: “build three small cars propelled by different mechanisms which can go a predetermined distance.”  I might add something like “Don’t use nuclear power to propel them.”

In real life the challenges reads something like: “build three small cars propelled by different mechanisms which can go a predetermined distance.” and then follow about 10 pages (literally) in 8 point print detailing every last aspect of the challenge.  The size of the care down to the quarter inch, how much it can cost, what materials can be used and not used, how much the vehicle can wobble and still be considered running smoothly – a condition.  Also the cars don’t just have to go a predetermined distance, they have to follow some excruciatingly detailed path inside a 20′ x 20′ feet square in which certain areas are marked off.  The ways to propel the cars are spelled out (so much about thinking creatively) and everything that is fun is explicitly forbidden.  Geek mom that I am my first thought was “firecracker tied to car”.  I thought it was brilliant – but, of course, the Safety Rules prohibit that.

Not only spell the rules every aspect of the challenge out , they are also subject to repeated revisions and so the parents will enjoy immensely the opportunity to compare different versions at various times and adjust the project.  Wait, the parents are not supposed to participate at all other than in a facilitator’s role (basically keeping the kid’s from smashing each others’ heads in)  – so the 8 year olds seem to be expected to read the rules, understand them and act accordingly.  No idea in what universe the people who came up with this live.  One thing is sure, thought, they do not have kids and where born middle-aged.

Somehow this whole mess is in some ways indicative of – and here I can’t speak for all of the US but certainly for the engineering driven culture of Silicon Valley – where creativity seem to be to follow very detailed rules and dot all the i’s and cross all the t’s.  The challenges couldn’t be more contrary to their alleged purpose if they tried.   To us it is painful to read the rules and see the kids struggle with trying solve the challenge, have some fun and stay within the narrow confines of the rules of this alleged contest in creativity and imagination.

If it was just my son I would encourage him to use a firecracker and a few more things that sparkle, bang and stink – even if it means he gets disqualified, at least he would have some fun and go out with a bang.  But as a member of a team of little geeks we’ll play by the rules.  Just this year, next year I am thinking of a challenge myself.

Self-Reliance

If I only had one word to characterize Americans “self-reliance” would be it.   It describes the heart and soul of America – as well as many of its (current political) excesses.

okay, a climber on a mountain top is plenty cliche but still expresses the idea quite well. Pic: skyscanner.net

Self-reliance is defined as “reliance on one’s own capabilities, judgment, or resources” and that is what I observe here every day and what attracted me to this country from the very start.  Back then it was more of a gut feeling, I left business school and just knew that the US would be the country which offered the better opportunities, that this would be the country where I could be successful and people would applaud me for it, not begrudge me my success.

As annoying the whole “everything will be alright” mantra is when heard too many times -especially in situations where things appear so hopeless that you can’t believe anything will ever be alright again – it is by far a better attitude then complaining, whining or surrendering.  As cliche the “glass half full” saying might be it is nevertheless true.  In America the glass is always half full, the sun will always rise again and – eventually, you just believe me – everything will be alright.

Overall this is an endearing quality that might come across as a tad naive to jaded Europeans when in fact it is just the expression of a very strong and fundamental belief that, indeed, everything will be alright.  It is not just lip service but in its core the conviction that everybody can get up and start over.

That is the good part of self-reliance.  The part that made it possible for this country to be settled by immigrants who crossed snow peaked mountains in rickety wagons and trekked across endless deserts with not much more than their determination to make it (leaving the discussion about how native American were mistreated aside for the moment).

Then there is a very dark side to self-reliance.  The one we are seeing now so openly and unabashedly displayed by the Republican party.  The point where self-reliance crosses the line to social Darwinism (interestingly enough often the loudest proponents of Social Darwinism by whatever name are the same people that call Evolution “The Monkey Theory” and insist their kids are taught creationism in school).

As much as I applaud self-reliance and the will to get up and try again one cannot cast aside everybody who for some reason or another is unable to do so as “unworthy”.  There is historical precedent for it and as I German – although even my parents where too young to have any part in that period of our history – I know a thing or two about it.

A society is only worth that label if it is willing to take care of and support its weakest.  Even after 200+ years history of living, breathing and preaching self reliance not everybody has the health, education, or strength to get up and try harder.   Not everybody can be an entrepreneur, investment banker (God forbid) or run Bain Capital.  And it is okay, we don’t need that many people who run Bain Capital but we need many people to do the ordinary stuff in life and we need to provide them with enough security that if they stumble and fall – which is entirely human – there is a cane to help them get up.

Self reliance is a valuable and admirable quality – taken to the extreme it is a vile and inhuman philosophy which, I had hoped, would never rear its ugly head again.

Once you are gone …, part 2

I argued before that after 10 years (or so) one doesn’t belong to the place where on came from anymore but somehow 10 years (or so) aren’t enough to truly belong where one moved to either.  This, too, is sad but true.

When I moved to Boston in 1997 I felt I belonged within three days.  Almost 15 years later, I know I never will.  I can’t quite say why or how that is, just that it is a fact.  In school I belonged because we all somehow did through our shared experience but later I realized that I am not an American, never will be and that this will set me apart forever.  Despite 15 years here, 12 in the Bay Area (admittedly more than many Americans spend here) I am lacking the cultural background and experiences people who grew up here share.  Sounds trivial?  Maybe, but somehow it is important to be able to talk about the girl scout days, that TV show in the 70s, and crack those jokes so much based in the culture of a country that I can learn, but never truly understand – or pull off.

I can simply not speak about my cheer-leading days not just because I never was a cheerleader (which I wouldn’t have been) but also because something even remotely like cheer-leading simply did not exist (and still doesn’t to the best of my knowledge whatever that is worth these days), not did homecoming or formal dances.  I wore my first long gown at the wedding of an – American – friend in LA.   I can of course, crack jokes about Star Trek – but only in German as I have hardly seen any episodes in English (and my English is very good, if I do say so myself, so it is not lack of vocabulary).

Where does that leave me – an observer, an astute one able to learn but still an observer.

So maybe that is just who I am, an observer, somebody who doesn’t really belong anywhere and for that reason might be the perfect person to live in the Bay Area, a place where most people who live here didn’t grow up and therefore don’t belong.  maybe the sense of not belonging makes us kindred spirits.

This realization makes me nervous about spending a year in German, what if I really don’t belong there and find few people who likewise don’t belong.  I guess, we’ll see.